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      09-20-2018, 07:24 PM   #507
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Originally Posted by DETRoadster View Post
Ah, yeah, that makes sense! BC is a world apart from Seattle, despite the close proximity.
Yeah I've never seen two cities so closeby having such different vibes and personalities.

Don't get me wrong the Seattle area is objectively a great place to live, especially if you are in the IT field. But something about B.C. just makes me feel amazing as soon as I cross that border.
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      09-20-2018, 11:52 PM   #508
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Originally Posted by Alfisti View Post
A lot of the thrill is in the chase and the "oh wow she likes me" ... that's never gonna happen again, ever, 'cos you've got them.
good to see im not alone with this
at times it makes me feel like shit when i realize this but it really gets boring once I know I "got" them
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      09-21-2018, 01:13 AM   #509
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Y’all must just be meeting boring ass women. Getting bored after years is normal. Getting bored after a couple dates means you probably just aren’t a good match.
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      09-21-2018, 02:31 AM   #510
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Y’all must just be meeting boring ass women. Getting bored after years is normal. Getting bored after a couple dates means you probably just aren’t a good match.
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      09-21-2018, 07:27 AM   #511
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Originally Posted by catcher22 View Post
This is so true. I once had a really pretty blonde and real cool coworker who moved to the DC area from rural Ohio. She was friendly as can be, but was astounded at how closed off people are in this area (just like Seattle i guess), especially while "in their zone". She would try to strike up conversations in the metro and random other places only for people to be suspect of the entire conversation to begin with. For those who did speak to her, most of the conversations obviously weren't genuine, scratched the surface, and were filled with rhetorical questions. Kinda different than the midwest attitude. I really found it amazing that a pretty cute blonde didn't get the reception she I guess was used to back home. It's a cold world out there sometimes.
I call bs. "Really pretty blonde" she knows all she has to do is walk outside & men will talk to her.
That's the point lol, it didn't really work (at least to her expectations I guess).

Isn't there an 11 year old thread somewhere else you should go and bring back? Stop trolling me and e90 man.
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      09-21-2018, 07:28 AM   #512
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That's the point lol, it didn't really work (at least to her expectations I guess).

Isn't there an 11 year old thread somewhere else you should go and bring back? Stop trolling e90 man.
A) I didn't bring the thread back. B) Truth hurts.
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      09-21-2018, 07:29 AM   #513
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Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke View Post
good to see im not alone with this
at times it makes me feel like shit when i realize this but it really gets boring once I know I "got" them
Then you pick the wrong ones.

I don't know how old you are, but at my age, I am tired of the chase. I don't jump through hoops.
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      09-21-2018, 07:30 AM   #514
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Not in the same way as first dates though.
I guess his point was for people that are looking for the "thrill".
Right, but it evolves as the relationship grows. Much better than a first date inf actuation.
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      09-21-2018, 08:50 AM   #515
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Originally Posted by Never_Enough View Post
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Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke View Post
good to see im not alone with this
at times it makes me feel like shit when i realize this but it really gets boring once I know I "got" them
Then you pick the wrong ones.

I don't know how old you are, but at my age, I am tired of the chase. I don't jump through hoops.
This.

I'd say they are just meeting the wrong people if they are getting bored. If you are bored with the person after a few dates you truly aren't attracted to them.

I came home yesterday after work to a surprise nerf gun war. We constantly prank each other.

You want someone who keeps life interesting.
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      09-21-2018, 09:22 AM   #516
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Better is relative...
You're bringing the room down, man!
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      09-21-2018, 09:31 AM   #517
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Originally Posted by CTinline-six View Post
This.

I'd say they are just meeting the wrong people if they are getting bored. If you are bored with the person after a few dates you truly aren't attracted to them.

I came home yesterday after work to a surprise nerf gun war. We constantly prank each other.

You want someone who keeps life interesting.
This is where it's at. I do miss having a fun relationship. I suppose there are trade-offs. I traded fun and intelligent conversation for safe....and now somewhat regretting it. Have I mentioned how great the sex is?
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      09-21-2018, 09:48 AM   #518
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Originally Posted by Not_Judy View Post
This is where it's at. I do miss having a fun relationship. I suppose there are trade-offs. I traded fun and intelligent conversation for safe....and now somewhat regretting it. Have I mentioned how great the sex is?
What are you doing to make it fun? Because let's say you want a relationship where there are some pranks / jokes (like nerf gun war - which, I thought doesn't happen except on TV, but maybe Josh is the exception)...if you initiate (and not just once, but again and again), it seems to me that it might rub off on her no?

Such that she wants to get you back and then plans something for you. Human nature and all.

I guess what I'm saying is make sure you are doing (repeatedly) what you would like to receive back. It isn't a guarantee that it will happen, but I do think it increases the likelihood of it happening - whatever it is.
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      09-21-2018, 09:57 AM   #519
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Better is relative...
Don't mention relatives. Those from the South will get excited
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      09-21-2018, 10:00 AM   #520
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Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
What are you doing to make it fun? Because let's say you want a relationship where there are some pranks / jokes (like nerf gun war - which, I thought doesn't happen except on TV, but maybe Josh is the exception)...if you initiate (and not just once, but again and again), it seems to me that it might rub off on her no?

Such that she wants to get you back and then plans something for you. Human nature and all.

I guess what I'm saying is make sure you are doing (repeatedly) what you would like to receive back. It isn't a guarantee that it will happen, but I do think it increases the likelihood of it happening - whatever it is.
This.

I started the prank war... a year ago. We mess with each other all the time, but it's in a fun flirty way, and helps to keep that spark. Sure not all the time is like this, but it helps you through the tough times when you know you can easily turn the other person's mood around.

And to think I initially did it as an ice breaker lol.
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      09-21-2018, 10:25 AM   #521
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Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
What are you doing to make it fun? Because let's say you want a relationship where there are some pranks / jokes (like nerf gun war - which, I thought doesn't happen except on TV, but maybe Josh is the exception)...if you initiate (and not just once, but again and again), it seems to me that it might rub off on her no?

Such that she wants to get you back and then plans something for you. Human nature and all.

I guess what I'm saying is make sure you are doing (repeatedly) what you would like to receive back. It isn't a guarantee that it will happen, but I do think it increases the likelihood of it happening - whatever it is.
Point taken.
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      09-21-2018, 10:33 AM   #522
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Originally Posted by CTinline-six View Post
This.

I started the prank war... a year ago. We mess with each other all the time, but it's in a fun flirty way, and helps to keep that spark. Sure not all the time is like this, but it helps you through the tough times when you know you can easily turn the other person's mood around.

And to think I initially did it as an ice breaker lol.
I agree 100% - I am usually in a good mood when I wake up and someone has to put me in a bad mood. I am that guy who will hide in closet and scare you, or reach in the shower and turn the water to cold - whatever. Teasing is a must. I dated a girl for a long period of time who was very pretty, liked my sense of humor, but I carried the load. She would get a kick out of me, but rarely gave it back or if she tried failed miserably, but she tried. I think I forgot about it till we broke up and the next girl I dated was FUNNY AS HELL! She makes me laugh every day and I forgot how much I missed it. Like you said - how can you stay mad at someone who can make you laugh at will? She has never dated anyone that makes her laugh, so it is all new to her to have someone that gives it back as good as I get. Sometimes I feel like we are in high school with the shit we do, but really who cares? If we laugh hard enough to hurt our bellies each day - isn't that what life is all about?

If laughing is your thing - don't give up till you find someone else who is too. Beauty fades, but a sense of humor can last forever. I want someone dropping water balloons on me from upstairs when I am 80 years old......
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      09-21-2018, 10:52 AM   #523
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Not to sound like a party-pooper here but I feel like I need to explain with a little more detail. I often joke around and like to think I'm a fun person to be around. My issue is that regardless of how funny someone may be if the other person has the personality of a dry noodle then you eventually stop trying. Don't get me wrong, she is very sweet and good to me, but personality isn't something that she has.

All too often I crack jokes and due to her lack of knowledge about current events, actors, musicians, etc. she has no idea who/what I'm talking about. Then I spend the next 10 minutes explaining the joke so that she can understand....at that point it isn't funny and I' annoyed that I've had to explain.

Hope this paints a better picture. I do appreciate you guys stating that I need to initiate, but I already have. Kinda hard to have fun with someone that stands there and looks at you in confusion when you try to mess with them. Some people just don't have a personality. Now if I were to engage her in a conversation about the women at work that she doesn't like or what's going on with her kids and school, she'll talk until my eyes are glazed over and I'm seconds from falling asleep.

In reality, I've been through enough therapy to know who I am as a person and why I make the decisions that I do. The two major relationships that I have been in were lots of fun and we enjoyed each others company immensely. Both of them ruined me in multiple ways and now I'm afraid to become involved with someone who is like this as I subconsciously think they will do me the same way. I realize this not to be the case with everyone....dammit, I need to go back to see the therapist again.
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      09-21-2018, 11:05 AM   #524
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      09-21-2018, 11:17 AM   #525
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Originally Posted by Never_Enough View Post
Then you pick the wrong ones.

I don't know how old you are, but at my age, I am tired of the chase. I don't jump through hoops.
I'm 20 - I don't know your age either but I can see that. I don't jump through hoops necessarily (which can explain why i get bored - i dont put in the "work" maybe) but I can definitely see how at some point you just want to have something like a relationship even if for an ease of mind kinda thing...


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Originally Posted by Not_Judy View Post
This is where it's at. I do miss having a fun relationship. I suppose there are trade-offs. I traded fun and intelligent conversation for safe....and now somewhat regretting it. Have I mentioned how great the sex is?
I guess that's where our personalities come in, at least for the time being I really don't think I want something "safe" over fun and/or intelligent conversation... I have terrible, terrible ADHD (like i can't even play games more than 1-1.5hrs and rarely am able to watch movies at one sitting) and I actually feel the need to be "stimulated" to be able to enjoy stuff... I don't not see myself as a relationship kind of guy but I can also get bored really easily...


Quote:
Originally Posted by Not_Judy View Post
Not to sound like a party-pooper here but I feel like I need to explain with a little more detail. I often joke around and like to think I'm a fun person to be around. My issue is that regardless of how funny someone may be if the other person has the personality of a dry noodle then you eventually stop trying. Don't get me wrong, she is very sweet and good to me, but personality isn't something that she has.

All too often I crack jokes and due to her lack of knowledge about current events, actors, musicians, etc. she has no idea who/what I'm talking about. Then I spend the next 10 minutes explaining the joke so that she can understand....at that point it isn't funny and I' annoyed that I've had to explain.

Hope this paints a better picture. I do appreciate you guys stating that I need to initiate, but I already have. Kinda hard to have fun with someone that stands there and looks at you in confusion when you try to mess with them. Some people just don't have a personality. Now if I were to engage her in a conversation about the women at work that she doesn't like or what's going on with her kids and school, she'll talk until my eyes are glazed over and I'm seconds from falling asleep.

In reality, I've been through enough therapy to know who I am as a person and why I make the decisions that I do. The two major relationships that I have been in were lots of fun and we enjoyed each others company immensely. Both of them ruined me in multiple ways and now I'm afraid to become involved with someone who is like this as I subconsciously think they will do me the same way. I realize this not to be the case with everyone....dammit, I need to go back to see the therapist again.
DO NOT hit your therapist up if you're happy in your relationship...

but on an unrelated notice, i know what you're saying. this one girl i've had/have a fling with isn't as bad as a dry noodle, but a wet noodle for sure. spending time with her is fun because I piss her off constantly (in a funny teasing way) but i also sadly know that it's not "sustainable"... i can only piss someone off so much and/or tell my funny memories for so long
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      09-21-2018, 11:33 AM   #526
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Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke View Post
DO NOT hit your therapist up if you're happy in your relationship...
Glad you picked up on the humor in that.
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      09-22-2018, 01:42 PM   #527
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last night was fun, was drunk from 5pm to 2am non-stop. friend took us out in his M4 convertible, got pulled over too so that wasnt as fun but we got off with a warning.

anyway, i was at a tailgate that my department hosted, i was almost the only person who was in undergrad, rest were faculty members and grad students - i realized something: i get bored of people because i'm doing so much myself

like, a grad student in the second best school for civil engineering would be doing some cool stuff, right? i talked the whole tailgate, and they listened, which is fun i like being the center of attention but working on sanitation and designing toilets is less interesting to me than what i do...

then we went out with the boys, chatted up some girls got a few numbers but im also tired of asking the same questions like did you ever do drugs, what do you think women look for in men, what are you passionate about etc because its mostly the same, boring answers
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      09-22-2018, 03:48 PM   #528
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Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke View Post
last night was fun, was drunk from 5pm to 2am non-stop. friend took us out in his M4 convertible, got pulled over too so that wasnt as fun but we got off with a warning.

anyway, i was at a tailgate that my department hosted, i was almost the only person who was in undergrad, rest were faculty members and grad students - i realized something: i get bored of people because i'm doing so much myself

like, a grad student in the second best school for civil engineering would be doing some cool stuff, right? i talked the whole tailgate, and they listened, which is fun i like being the center of attention but working on sanitation and designing toilets is less interesting to me than what i do...

then we went out with the boys, chatted up some girls got a few numbers but im also tired of asking the same questions like did you ever do drugs, what do you think women look for in men, what are you passionate about etc because its mostly the same, boring answers
Lol then stop asking the same questions. Stop asking questions like that, period. If you have to give a fucking interview to have a conversation it’s not worth pursuing.
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