Quote:
Originally Posted by ZGirl4U
Wow 
I am in no way poking fun at you Shi. You sure are persistent though! I mean even getting the opinions of random people. It must suck to be a guy and have to do the approaching plus the possibility of being turned down. Its good that youre making an effort but i wouldnt have went back a second time esp since she was being very defensive. How old are you btw? The key is being cool [as in calm] and confident. |
Quote:
Originally Posted by ZGirl4U
That line would probably piss me off actually. Your delivery needs much work, grasshopper.
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Thanks for the feedback, cause I certainly need the help
I'm currently trying to figure out how to find out the relationship status of a girl (who wears a ring) without causing offence... perhaps what I thought up might work after some conversation has preceeded it?
Approaching random people on the street is something I never did before. People encouraged me to do so to get rid of my nervousness when talking to complete strangers so I forced myself to go through with it. I now find it a lot less intimidating to start a conversation with a random stranger.
I certainly don't plan on being this persistent in the future, I went back a 2nd time as I was not clear enough and left it at such an awkward point the first time. I think I did succeed on clearing the awkwardness - she was a lot more friendly the 2nd time after I made my intentions perfectly clear.
Ah, I forgot to mention, I talked to her in English, but she's used to speaking Dutch. Perhaps this contributed to her defensiveness the first time round.
The whole thing was rather embarrassing but I was able to learn quite a lot from the experience, if I were to do it again I'd approach it very differently:
- Make some small talk from the first time I go to the shop, perhaps even just a "hello", rather than not say anything for the first so many visits. This way I hope to be able to see if she's hostile or not.
- not leave things to so close to Valentine's day
- find out her relationship status somehow
- not to ask for a name until some familiarity is reached
etc
I'm 25, but had only asked out girls I knew rather well via school before now, and that was all a lot easier for me. Success rate was also a lot better
I think once I've had more practice approaching random people (both male and female, just to talk), I'll be more naturally calm and confident when talking to someone I'd want to date.